Debbie's Reviews > The Many Lives of Mama Love: A Memoir of Lying, Stealing, Writing, and Healing

A soccer mom turned addict

I liked this memoir about a rich soccer mom who has a secret opioid addiction, steals money from friends, and ends up in jail. The story flows just like a good novel. There’s a lot of dialogue, and I always flinch a bit when a writer uses dialogue and quotation marks a lot in a memoir—how could she possibly remember such detailed conversations from her past? The dialogue made the story richer and more dramatic, but it made the memoir lose a little credibility, too. It reminds me that I can’t believe everything I read. Conversations could not possibly have gone down exactly like she said.

I was pulled into this memoir from page 1. Before you know it, she’s in jail. Her four-year-old son is sent to live with relatives (though not blood relatives), but she’s freaked, of course. It looked like her prison sentence would be long and she would lose custody. I can’t believe it (because I know a lot about addiction), but I felt judgy! (I hang my head in shock and embarrassment!) I couldn’t stand that she had risked depriving a kid of his mom for what looked to be his whole life—and she had three other boys, too, who lived with their dad. What was she thinking to let herself get addicted? Ha, yes, I know that’s not how addiction works—of course she didn’t choose to take a risk that might end in her losing her sons, but still, I was miffed. I’m a mama bear when I come across a really bad mom; I want to protect the youngins.

But I forgave her as the story progressed. She became a hero of sorts in jail, helping other women write appeals and letters. Her husband was a doozy, and I liked how well she outlined their complex relationship. I don’t want to spoil the story, so I won’t tell you anything more. I’ll only say that she continued to be a hero in my eyes. She was so strong and persistent and patient.

A couple of things bugged me—things she left out. For instance, she didn’t talk about how rough it was to detox in jail. I would have thought she’d go into that because of how hard and major kicking an addiction is. Also, she doesn’t explain how she afforded things on the outside. I’m guessing she chose to leave these topics out, but I wanted to know about them.

The main gist of the story is about how messed up the jail story is in America, how once you get in the system, it’s nearly impossible to get out. Much food for thought. She gets her point across without being preachy, which I appreciate.

The story is riveting and so well told. The author is a writer by trade, and she has the chops for sure. I was sucked into her life completely and was rooting for her all the way. But—and this is weird—it’s been a few weeks since I finished reading this book, and I don’t have that glow-y feeling that happens when I think back on a good book. So I guess all that means is that it doesn’t fall into the Amazing Book category. But after my initial, short judgy period, I just loved reading the book, and that’s what counts.

Thanks to NetGalley for the advance copy.

Expected publication date: August 1, 2023